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i see you lying beside my study table looking weak and tired. it has been the same routine for you this past 5 years or so. but now i wonder, if u'll be here with me a week from now. i prayed so hard that you will be because i need and want you so badly. i can never imagine you leaving me, im selfish that way and i love you. please beat the cancer cells, im begging you. im crushed beyond words.



and, where were you when i needed you most. gah